Excessive shyness
Many people think they are shyer than they actually are. According to psychologists at Stanford University in California, USA, 30–40% of people say they are shy, but when their behaviour is observed only 15–20% behave in a shy manner (but of course they may still be feeling shy inside).
What causes social phobia?
Treatments for shyness
- Social skills training, in which the individual is taught simple social skills such as how to start a conversation, is one possibility.
- Another approach is cognitive therapy, in which the individual is taught to think of the social situation in a new way, instead of focusing on their own inadequacies. Research shows that people with social phobia are oversensitive. They believe that if they make a social error other people will think very badly of them and that they actually deserve this bad opinion (J Anxiety Disord 2005;19:245–74). Cognitive therapy can help put things in perspective and overcome this negative thinking.
Cognitive therapy for social anxiety disorder (social phobia)
A person with social anxiety has very negative thoughts, such as:
- “If the conversation stops, it will be my fault”
- “I won't be able to think of anything to say”
- “I'm boring”
- “I'm a social failure”
- deliberately pause during a conversation and see what happens
- look for real signs (rather than imaginary ones) of whether the other person actually is bored
- recognize that a conversation may dry up because the other person has nothing to say – in general, concentrate on past successes rather than failures
- Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs for short, help to ease the anxiety symptoms and panic feelings that go with social phobia. Although some people respond quickly, others have to take the medication for 12 weeks before noticing any benefit, so be patient (Lancet 2008;371:1115–25).
- Beta-blockers control the physical signs of anxiety, such as shakiness, so they can make you calmer for a specific event such as public speaking.
- Reversible inhibitors of monoamine oxidase, or RIMAs for short, are sometimes used. Research studies of their effectiveness have given varied results. Therefore they are not available in some countries.
Written by: Dr Margaret Stearn
Edited by: Dr Margaret Stearn
Last updated:
Friday, February 12th 2010
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Shyness
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