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Vagina too tight

The vagina itself is never too small to accommodate a penis – remember that its walls are stretchy enough to allow a full-sized baby to pass along it. But it can seem too small for sex if the muscles at its entrance go into a spasm when your partner tries to insert his penis. This is a fairly rare condition called vaginismus.

Some women with vaginismus can insert a tampon without any problem, but others find that trying to insert anything – a tampon, a finger or a penis – makes the muscles contract. Women with vaginismus often avoid having cervical smears, because they think it will be painful or impossible.
 
Very occasionally, the penis cannot be inserted because the hymen (which is the membrane at the entrance to the vagina) is unusually tough, but this is very rare indeed.
 
How the woman feels. Vaginismus is a very distressing condition. It is very painful if your partner attempts to push his way in, and you may feel wary that he may do this. You may also have feelings of anger, guilt and inadequacy, and fear that your partner may leave you. Some women withdraw from all physical contact – even holding hands – in case it leads to sex.
 
How the partner feels. Partners are usually confused and worried. Your partner will hate the idea of causing you any pain. He may think that his sexual technique is at fault.
 
What causes vaginismus? It is really a deep-rooted phobia of penetration, and perhaps of pregnancy or childbirth. The reason is different for each woman: it can result from some unresolved sexual conflict, from sexual abuse or from a belief that sexual activity is undesirable. You may have had a painful vaginal condition that has left you with a conditioned fear of sex.
 
Vaginismus should not be confused with frigidity; women with vaginismus are often sexually responsive, but can not tolerate penetration.
 
Treatment. Vaginismus can be helped. Relate, the counselling organization, reports that of 3693 women seen over a 2-year period, 80% improved with therapy.
 
Psychosexual counselling. The therapy is not at all frightening. You will be taught how to relax your vaginal muscles and eventually to insert a small tampon. In due course you will learn to insert larger tampons. If you have a partner, the therapist will start by telling you not to attempt sex. Instead, you will be encouraged to resume non-genital physical contact in very small steps, such as holding hands, sitting close together or putting an arm round each other. Quite late in the programme, you and your partner will be shown how you can insert his penis yourself, as if it were a tampon; he lies on his back and is not allowed to move at this stage. Only at the very end of the therapy programme will you be encouraged to have proper sex.
 
What your doctor can do. To get this psychosexual therapy, it is best to talk to your doctor. Explain that you have a problem with sex, and that this problem means that you have not been able to have sex at all. Your doctor will be able to check that there is no physical problem (such as a tough hymen) and will then arrange for psychosexual counselling as outlined above. A few doctors are specially trained in this area and will do the therapy themselves. In the UK, if you do not want your doctor to be involved you can contact Relate (see Useful contacts or look in your phone book for your local branch). Relate provides very good psychosexual counselling, but there may be a waiting list.
 

Written by: Dr Margaret Stearn
Edited by: Dr Margaret Stearn
Last updated: Thursday, March 25th 2010

 


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Comments on this article

Posted by amy on 24/02/2014 at 09:11

I do have a problem with my partner penis,it is to big and fat and my vagina its to tight and it hurts very bad when we are doing it. I do get wet enough for him to penetrate but its not helping and after making love I feel like my vagina is swollen. And we can't repeat sex later on. If u know any lubricating for it please let me know.

Posted by Anonymous on 16/02/2014 at 08:15

Is iit possible to get like a "rug burn" in the inner lips of your vagina when you have sex?

Posted by Optional on 13/02/2014 at 06:46

Your artical here is good but it dose not solves my problem in any manner what so ever ....

Posted by Diteboho on 06/02/2014 at 10:15

More often than not, i have sex with my partner i feel so much pain i even cry and sometimes he stoped before he ejeculate.so is tht posible?

Posted by Sweety on 12/01/2014 at 06:00

Hi I m sorry to ask ths question? Me n my husband is trying for baby since 5 months but whenever we do sex we both don't feel nything n evn I just think tht is it gng in rght position n we don't njy At all !!pls help me

Posted by Optional on 18/11/2013 at 08:43

I have the same problem too, it's very hard for me to have sex with my boyfriend because I'm very tight maybe because I'm not sexual active. Before I meet my boyfriend its been 7 years never had sex with anyone until I meet my boyfriend. I would love to marry him one day, but I'm afraid it's gonna be hard for me to have a baby. I'm scared, please help.

Posted by Optional on 17/11/2013 at 06:08

my new boyfriend has a large penis and it hurts when he puts it all in me at once. We use lube but I'm still sore after we have sex.

Posted by Optional on 11/11/2013 at 07:48

Tnx fr creating this page.got disvirgined at 23 my vaginal walls are,too tight only painful on penetration

Posted by Faith on 06/10/2013 at 05:40

Still strugling

Posted by Neeraj on 27/09/2013 at 07:20

I am having problem in sexual intercourse as my wife does not allow me to open the vagina with hand, she feels that she can't tolerate the pain. Thus, how intercourse can be done in this case?

Posted by Optional on 08/09/2013 at 09:56

i have the same situation with my wife. we have been married for several years but until now i can't penetrate her. can you help us to solve this.

Posted by Optional on 26/08/2013 at 12:59

Please help : am married, i love my wife, the stress when we had to have sex, i dont fit her, any pills to make her vagina constract ? So for us to enjoy each other

Posted by Optional on 16/08/2013 at 11:20

i have same problem, even after my first issue, i cant stil ve sex without lubricant. It is so frastracting that i do aviod my hubby somehing

Posted by Optional on 30/07/2013 at 10:24

I some times feel relax but most of the time am not I worry and my vigina gets tight and when I realise that it gets more tighter and after sex I feel.pain and stiched.plz help

Posted by Optional on 12/07/2013 at 10:58

Husband could not have sex with me his wife for 12 years. Now deceased. I've found someone but I just can't get his penis in.

Posted by Jacintal on 11/07/2013 at 09:37

When your viginal is tight this is good because it normal.it normal in the sence that when you whant to have sex with you hubb let him romance you very well be for he penetrate to your viginal.in the process of romancing ur viginal would have wet so he can easly penetrate wi thout any pain.

Posted by Suzy on 07/07/2013 at 08:57

I never used a tampon or never had sex and it hurts really bad when i try to use a tampon. How can i be able to use it?

Posted by Me on 04/07/2013 at 04:39

I tryd avin sex.i waz wet and ready buh when he insertd z penis,it was xo painful dat i screamd xo loud.he got so frustratd nd left tellin me dat my pussy is over tight

Posted by Jonathan on 22/06/2013 at 11:25

Hi, I'm commited to a new relationship, but my previus partner had a problem dat suits the definition of vaginasmus. She felt severe pain in the vagina during slight penetration. But oral sex was the only form of sexual plesure reaching great orgasms throught it. I aquired sexual plesure by rubbing my penis like penetration act btween her thighs just below her vulva. I loved her and dremt of future wit her, but i think d nature of our sex life contributed to me leaving her after 3years. I still care abt her and i wonder wher she can get this medication in Swaziland or in South Africa. She wil b scared to move on even when time is right bcos of this. I care abt her i wana help her. She deserve the best, and fairness in life!!

Posted by misscalm88 on 17/06/2013 at 04:37

well i am 24 years of ages, i have 2 children, after having my 2 child and becoming a single mum. 1 yr and a half ago, i have been struggling during intercourse, it hurts when Kris inserts his penis and thrust and when fore play also painful when doctors insert stuff for examinations i end up crying and biting my lip or if its really bad i scream with the pain and double up with it i cant handle this no more. my other half is in the Royal Air Force, but this is causing too much stress and it either make or break between us. can anyone help me ??

Posted by Lee Dianalous on 11/06/2013 at 11:19

My vagina is too tigh and am vey worrie coz m goin to give birh soo.

Posted by OptionaAisha on 08/06/2013 at 10:55

My husband cannot penetrate me because of my tight vigina

Posted by Optional on 03/06/2013 at 12:33

My fiance and I have a great sex life… thought I should start by saying that, but just recently (little less than a week) the entrance of my vagina has become very tight and it takes much effort from him and myself to get things going even though I'm dripping wet & he's rock hard… but once he get things going it's great not painful @ all, but the new beginning process is embarrassing & steals my mood…! Help cause we both ♥ sex too much for this bull…!

Posted by Alice on 06/05/2013 at 02:55

My vagina is way too tight.I am afraid to have sex with anyone now days. Yes I do love it, but I have worry that any guy I have sex with will not like or enjoy it because of my abnormally small tight vagina. I am 25 and have not been with a lot of guys but have been with a few. None of them had problems getting and it didn't hurt me, but they still talk about "how tight I am" I am not sure if this is good or bad. I hate it that guys have almost ruined sex for me!!!

Posted by Diana on 27/04/2013 at 01:58

i used tto have sex with my boyfriend , but then i got small cuts and had itching which eventually healed . We again had sex a few times . But for the past many months it gets etremely painful and it is not possible for him to insert his penis in my vagina . I dint know what the problem is when i had a normal sex life before ! Please help !

Posted by Optional on 26/04/2013 at 04:27

I'm a virgin and have never been afraid of penetration unit I started to explore my own body and realized I couldn't insert more than two fingers, and even then there is some burn! And it doesn't make sense because I have extremely small hands! I always make sure I am relaxed and aroused but nothing seems to work :/

Posted by Daniela on 30/03/2013 at 04:27

I feel so much relief after reading this. I´m a virgin, and I feel that I´m ready to have sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, who is 22 years old, but I was afraid of trying because I get frightened when he tries to put his penis inside my vagina. I just strat thinking of the pain I´ve been told having a penis inside causes, and then I just keep closing my legs.

Posted by linda on 09/03/2013 at 06:05

am so confussed,my boyfriend now is my ex because i had alot of pain whenever he tries to make love.we went to gyno but still the pain was very present.so plz help because i need a kid thou my boyfriend left me.

Posted by Optional on 07/03/2013 at 07:37

ex wife was virgin when we married. she had real issues with sex. She ask me to just do it and she cried the entire time. Not real good feeling. i figured it might stop at some point. It did not. She was so fearful of sex she started arguements and just refused. Several Dr's told she was fine. I am much larger than avg, some women had problems, none like her. I went on to have healthy sex life with other women and finally my wife of over 20 year. I still hurt her some times, but we work through it. I tried oral on her for hopes of her relaxing, she was turned off by the act as well as giving oral to me. it was a disaster for us both.

Posted by davet on 01/02/2013 at 12:47

Embarassing problems like this are just that, embarassing. However, there is no need to fear consulting with a professional in physical therapy naperville. They can help. It's their job. They'll be professional about it.

Posted by Sally on 19/11/2012 at 10:21

I have found a great product called a vagi-wave. The site is called www.vagi-wave.co.uk. It helps with vaginism and I have successfully sorted my problem out. The product works by re-programming your brain so that it overcomes any negative thoughts or fears. I had a trauma in my earlier years which basically caused everything to tighten (my pc muscles) and the very thought of sex or examination. I went for my first smear 2 weeks ago and thank god everything is fine. I agree with the comment that the problems are usually psychosexual and that I knew that was my problem all along so that is why I went for the vagi-wave product. Oh and the other thing I can now use tampons. hope this helps

Posted by Optional on 31/10/2012 at 05:41

My wife has a retroinverted uterus. It took several months to even have sex after marriage. It's like not being able to even find her vagina or that somehow it grew closed. Age has only caused this problem to be worse. She does not like oral sex, so I guess sex is just goingt to be out of the question. So now what? My marriage is like a car stuckl in neutral.

Posted by Optional on 25/09/2012 at 05:00

I didn't use to have this problem. I don't know what happened. I need help. I'm afraid I'm going to lose my lover.

Posted by nikl on 18/09/2012 at 03:44

I been using tampons for the past 2 years but I haven't been sexualy active 4 almost 10 months now and now I cnt wear a tampons I even bought the smallest size in it stil hurts me why is this

Posted by Kenyan girl on 15/08/2012 at 09:10

Hi sad girl, i just saw your post right now. I also had the same problem,still have it, am and am looking for treatment too, you are not alone, and there is hope out there,its sad i have not seen any facilities offeringe treatment for this condition, but hoping it will change soon. All the best in your endevours, do not lose hope!

Posted by A.A. on 14/07/2012 at 10:35

Hello my is Amber and I'm 19.yrs old.Before sexual intercourse my partner has to use lubrication and insert himself into me slowly.After about 5-10 minutes things are fine.If my partner doesn't use lubrication, I bleed.I've only had two partners ever, is this normal??

Posted by Optional on 06/06/2012 at 06:33

I wanted to post here because I have struggled with vaginismus and after finding treatment, I am able to have pain free sex. First, I just want all of you that are struggling with this problem to know that you are not alone. After extensively researching painful sex, I have found that it is much more common than this article states. The problem is that most doctors and health professionals are not aware of it or dismiss it as nervousness about sex. While it can be due to a fear of sex or other psychological causes as this article states, it is not just psychologically based. Hopefully, my story can help others who are in a similar situation. I was a virgin until I got married last year and I was looking forward to finally having sex with my husband. When we tried to have sex on our wedding night, I had the same experience many of you mentioned of my vagina feeling too tight and experiencing a stabbing pain when my husband tried to enter me. For a while, I thought this was normal since I had never had sex before. Many of you may think the same but it is important for you to know that sex should not be painful after the first time or two. If the pain continues, don't keep having sex. Instead, find a specialist who can help because it is possible to have pain free sex. The problem I experienced is that many doctors don't know about vaginismus or think it's "all in your head." I went to several gynecologists who told me I just needed to "relax" or just keep having sex despite the pain and everything would be fine. This is not the case! Fortunately, I finally found a physical therapist who specializes in women's health and who is a pelvic floor specialist. She helped me realize that it was not "all in my head" or a fear of sex. The vaginal muscles, like any muscles can tighten up for many reasons. Sometimes, people just carry stress in those muscles like they would in the shoulder or neck muscles. If you are going through a stressful time, it could be that your vaginal muscles are just carrying more tension than usual. This is not the only cause of vaginismus, but it was true for me. Whatever the reason for tightness and pain in the pelvic floor/vaginal muscles, it can be treated with physical therapy (and possibly counseling if there is a lot of fear associated with sex as well). After only 1 month of physical therapy, I started being able to have pain free sex, so I know it is possible. Ijust want everyone to know that it is possible to recover. If you have this problem, you can contact a physical therapist in women's health who is a pelvic floor/pelvic pain specialist. They can use stretching and strengthening exercises, dilators, manual therapy, biofeedback, and other methods to effectively treat vaginismus. If you are near Atlanta, GA, here are a few links to specialists in that area: http://www.wfrehab.com/about-us/ http://www.physiocorp.com/content.cfm/specialized-treatments Good luck! And please talk to others so we can help raise awareness about vaginismus and help other women who feel alone and helpless!

Posted by Opeyemi on 01/06/2012 at 05:40

Please what causes the hymen to be tough

Posted by Optional on 31/05/2012 at 05:16

I have issues when it comes to inserting tampons, when it comes to fingering and sex however i can do it but it hurts when inserting, I cant move I have to constrate and it makes me scared that my boyfriend will one day leave me as I struggle.

Posted by Optional on 23/05/2012 at 12:40

I physically cannot put a tampon let alone a finger into my vagina. It feels as though there is a barrier of a large ball shape literally right at the entrance and i can't get past it without it being uncomfortable or painful. I'm too scared to have sex due to it.

Posted by Optional on 16/05/2012 at 04:37

I got married a year ago, am not still not able to get my husband in.. He feels very bad. My hymen is broken, doctor said i dont have any problem but when my husband tries, he is not able to push it inside, moreover it pains a lot

Posted by Optional on 12/05/2012 at 12:22

ok,how do i start? been with partner 22 years, got 2 kids, initially i used to come too soon, but now it hurts when we try penetration, have had vasectomy, feel like it's my fault somehow??, lubrication not a problem.....

Posted by Optional on 14/04/2012 at 08:28

I think i hve the same problem i love my boyfriend nd he loves me 2 but everytime we try and have sex its a problem i have fear that its goin 2 hurt nd start getting scared and afraid and he has been so patient with me for 2years now and it makes me angry that i feel this way i want to enjoy but how can i because i feel so scared really really really......scared but after reading this now i understand why i feel this way and after so many attempts of us trying to break my virginity and i feel like i'm the only 1 with the problem but after reading this now i understand.thanx article was so insightful

Posted by Sad girl on 12/03/2012 at 08:43

I used to think it takes a while for a girl to break her virginity while having sex but after consulting further, i realized it takes less than 10 minutes or maximum of 20 minutes depending.So when i attempted,it took hours with no success.My casual attempts bore no fruits either.I thot i was abnormal or small until i came across this thing called vaginismus.Its really frustrating and to make matters worse,this issue is not addressed so much in kenya even when i try to google.Sometimes i fill am the only kenyan chic with this problem with no where to sort help from :-( ..Any one from kenya out there???

Posted by Optional on 11/03/2012 at 03:04

hi me and my partner has had great sex for past 6 years..this last wile he finds its tight to insert and somtimes bleeds with the pain..is this my problem?

Posted by Optional on 02/03/2012 at 06:27

I tried having sex with my boyfriend twice and both attempts failed we could not get his penis inside my vagina I don't know what to do I been waiting my whole like for this it's my first time with the guy I really love,but I am extremely scared to get pregnant & I wouldn't want that right now. He clearly said my vagina felt to tight. Is it possible I have Vinismus? I really want to be able to have sex. Any help.

Posted by Flower on 29/12/2011 at 06:18, United Kingdom

Hey, I had vaginismus and recently overcame this, if any lady is experiencing issues whereby they cannot have their partner enter then or is very painful then you can buy a full treatment kit for this via www.vaginismus.com. This is how I was cured. I can honestly say I don't believe in the rubbish people who say is sex is painful because our first time was pain free all due to treating vaginismus! Flower

Posted by I LOVE K-Y JELLY on 22/12/2011 at 10:47, United States

i haven't had sex in a long while because every time my guy would try to enter into my vagina it would feel like a rug burn sensation and that made it hard for us to be intimate until we were introduce to k-y jelly it was the best thing that could of happen to us. now we are like two energize bunnies we keep going and going thanks k-y jelly.

Posted by Van on 05/12/2011 at 01:48, Viet Nam

I never used a tampon before because of discomfort. I recently decided to have sex with my 1st serious bf. I love him and want to accommodate him inside me. But I get so upset & frustrated. He's able to insert 1 finger at this point but it's very uncomfortable. I feel like it's not gonna get better. I don't even feel pleasure from penetration. I enjoy clitoral masturbation a lot with him. So I just want to give up & not try anymore.

Posted by wai on 04/11/2011 at 05:17, Hong Kong

hi, my gf is a virgin. and we tried having sex and it was painful..i feel like its just my penis' head thats inside and i cant really penetrate deep. i dont know if im "doing" the right hole or im doing the right thing (angle, position).

Posted by Optional on 30/10/2011 at 03:56, United States

This is a great and helpful website and all but it bothers me that in this article you just dismissed the possibility of it being something other than vaginismus. I am pretty sure that's not what I've got. I have an unusually thick hymen that is incredibly difficult to break. I actually did not get my period because of it becuase the blood was not able to escape and I noticed this because I felt a bump around my tummy.. went to a doctor and had minor surgery just to cut the hymen (i was put asleep for this) i was like 16 at that point. and then afterwards i got my period finally.. it lasted for a really long time too to get all the blood out. Anyways a year later, 17 now, gotten intimate with my boyfriend and sex just does not seem like a possiblity. I know that when I got a check up at the gynocologist after my surgery she said that I might need the same surgery again if i want to have sex as it's still really tight down there. After must patience I can be comfortable and enjoy fingering but it still is painful at times and considering that it just doesnt seem like there's anyway a penis is getting in there. Anyway, the main point is that I wish you would have information on this issue as well instead of just saying how rare it is and moving on to vaginismus.

Posted by Anonymous on 27/09/2011 at 12:26, South Africa

I had sex for first time 3 weeks ago.i expected it to be very enjoyable,but i was disappointed.i wasn't aroused and my boyfriend couldn't get inside me but he managed to finger me.i thought this was because i was a virgin but after reading about vaginismus i think i may have it...the worst part is that we've never spoken abt the experience.should i tell him about my concerns?

Posted by Jason on 05/09/2011 at 12:25, United States

I've finally met my dream girl. She's 43, is petite, and we're both crazy about one another. The sexual energy is unmistakeable. However, I'm concerned about her enjoyment of intercourse w/ me, as it is obviosly painful. She can handle my finger or two, but thats about it. She wants all of me, but when we attempt intercourse, it is obvious she is hurting. She has had only 3 other sexual experiences in her life, and those were painful as well. I'm concerned that she will become increasingly frustrated w/ herself, as she is heavily aroused, but just can't take the penetration moment. How can we deal w/ this, and is there any chance it will be easier and less painful w/ continued effort? I really have deep feelings for her, and I know she feels the same...any suggestions for us would greatly appreciated! Thank you

Posted by Optional on 01/09/2011 at 10:04, Ghana

I like this but can a lubriant help for easy peneteration?

Posted by Optional on 26/08/2011 at 07:02

i have a boyfriend from last 6 years but we never had a real sexual intercourse,we have tried at once...he hasinserted his finger in my vagina i dont have much pain but when he tried to insert 2 fingers at a time it was not possible for me to bear the pain so i had shouted...so at that time we didnt had real penetration...heis very nervous with this..please help what can i do for a normal sex life?? we are going to marry in next year.i need aproper answer

Posted by Optional on 26/08/2011 at 05:30

ive never had a problem with having sex with my partner but the other day it hurt so bad when he tried putting it in then after a while ity didnt hurt then when we finished it hurt soo bad and i noticed my vagina feels tight never happened before im not preg because im on the depo shot

Posted by Optional on 21/06/2011 at 02:41

The vaginal opening, not the vagina, in my case, IS TOO TIGHT and is very painful. My large sized lover has not been able to get past this barrier because of the pain it causes me. My question is, can this be stretched. I know that women often require an episiotomy in orde to give birth. Does my age have something to do with the flexibility in this area. My man insists that if I were younger I would not be having this problem. Never having had such a large penised man before, I cannot confirm nor deny. But it is not a matter of the vagina stretching, it is the vaginal opening (what some have referred to as the hymen?). Must I get surgery to open myself further?

Posted by Optional on 29/05/2011 at 10:52

This page was very helpful whether it was the answer to my problem I'm not sure. As iv had 2 operations down below so it's a 50/50 chance as to whether what iv just read is the answer. It reads quite promising.

Posted by Optional on 25/05/2011 at 02:22

Hi, My doctor diagonised me of Vaginismus about three mths ago and gave me Xylocaine jelly to use with my husband. My husband achieve penetration two weeks after then but since then i still experience pain during penetration because my husband always forces his way in which is painful to me. we do foreplay but d hole in the middle of my hymen is just small. though, the pain is only experience during penetration alone. Pls what is the cause? should i go back and complain to my doctor

Posted by Optional on 19/05/2011 at 08:07

I am 27 Newly married , I am trying to have sex with my wife from 2 months , wen ever i taught of inserting my pennis into her vagina she is so scared. I even saw her vagina with very very small hole . wen ever i touch with finger she shouts . So I am unable to instert my pennis . what may be the problem

Posted by amrutha on 17/05/2011 at 07:49

am recently married nd i 2 hav dis fear.... wen ma husband cms evrythng goes wel bt wen t coms to insertion f penis i jus cnt do it i dnt knw wats rong.. ma husband feels horible......i badly need help......

Posted by Optional on 11/05/2011 at 12:51

I'm a 17 yr old virgin and I'm scared that my vagina is too tight for sex. When I insert a finger I can feel a round ball shape, is this normal? Some say it's your g-spot but I'm Not sure as it's not that deep in. What should I do? As I am too shy to try to have sex incase his penis won't fit inside me :( asap reply please.

Posted by sevan on 05/04/2011 at 12:43

Im not quite sure if this is relevant to what I am going through. I know that I'm still a Virgin and I had my ex bf try and break my virginity and the minute he was about to insert his penis it really started to hurt. And the problem with me is I worry when I try and insert an object into my genital area I immediately get tight and its hurts.. My question is, is that is the skin to tough and will this be an issue for a while. Because I feel to scared to have sex now with my new partner partner ?

Posted by ella on 03/04/2011 at 12:53

i am still a virgin but fear that my vagina may be too tight for when i want to have sex. after about 3 attempts i successfully inserted a tampon, but when i have tried to masterbate i can only manage to fit one finger up,and when i have tried two, it rally hurts, what do i do?

Posted by Optional on 31/03/2011 at 12:11

I've been marride 2o years, struggling to get his penis inside me, as i am getting older i would like to start a family please help!

Posted by Optional on 13/02/2011 at 08:36

I always cry when ever i had sex bc is too painful,i guss i hav the problem of vaginismus.And my boyfriend left me bc of it.Plz am dyin i cnt continue sufferin lik dis i need ur help.

Posted by Optional on 25/01/2011 at 05:41

I'm 17...ive tried having sex multiple times and everytime they get in very little(not even their head) i hurt really bad and make them stop. i cant use tampons the hurt and i hate the thought of them and also the thought of being swabbed. i have a history of being sexually abused so im thinking this may be my problem. i just dont know how im supposed to go through this alone and at my age. fml.

Posted by Anonymous on 20/01/2011 at 03:58

I don't know if this is my problem. i enjoy sex and it doesn't feel too tight for me, but sometimes he's bruised afterwards. so is it a problem with me or him? he's not particuarly large and i've had larger before without a problem.

Posted by Optional on 26/12/2010 at 11:14

my wife went away for a girls week and came back with herpes type a around here vagina. We'd had a stressful year. I was angry, letdown but felt id contributed to whatever had caused her to cheat on me. Long story she had the Herpes treatment and we had a month away with tons of great sex. Since coming back the sex has steadily dropped off to point now she bleeds if I penetrate, despite using tons of lubricant and foreplay. Im too young to stop sex and other methods get a bit repetitive after a while.

Posted by Optional on 15/12/2010 at 01:11

the article is helpful because i thought had this condition because the two times ive had sex it hurt.

Posted by Optional on 27/11/2010 at 08:22

My husband says that my vagina is too small to insert hie penis. Is there an operation to solve this problem?

Posted by paul on 19/11/2010 at 04:35

my wife's vagina is too tight and we been having seriuos difficulties having sex so what can we do?

Posted by Shantel on 17/10/2010 at 09:59

I had the same problem, but I've gotten through it step by step.

Posted by Optional on 07/10/2010 at 10:43

I havnt had sex yet but i feel i may have this problem. I tried using tampons but everytime i would try to insert it i would cry.I am a virgin, but guys have tried pleasuring me other ways(finger) this really hurts me. I make them stop. They then tell me they only got about a fingernail length size inside......thats nothing, yet it makes me want to cry. It all feels like a very raw painful feeling. Im terrifed to have sex and i do not want to have cervical smears because well ill flip out. Im 19 and i really hope i dont have this problem

Posted by Sheena on 17/09/2010 at 08:38

This article was very useful. It was helpful in what I was trying to figure out. I am a married woman who has only had one partner. My husband has been with other women before me so we were able to easily figure out that the problem in our sexual relationship was at my fault. Every time we try to have sexual intercourse, it is very painful and difficult for me to bare. Some days we can not have intercourse because my body will completely refuse to perform such acts. I lead myself to believe that that the way God made me was that my vaginal opening was just too small and that i was too tight for my husbands large sized penis. But, as i read this article, it became clear that there may be other reasons as to the brick wall between my husband and me. As i recalled in this article that one of the things a woman could have this happen is by sexual abuse, and I honestly never gave that a thought. I was deeply abused as a young girl by men and women and the acts they performed- i honestly can not do today and I have tried with my husband. So just to be opened at that- helped me already. Thank you.

Posted by Optional on 08/09/2010 at 11:52

My virgina is too tight and i'm finding it difficult to have sex. I felt alot of pains the day i tried to make an attempt with my husband. Please help me.

Posted by Optional on 15/08/2010 at 10:40

I have been married for just over a month and me and my husband have tried penetration about 5-6 times. It seems that whenever he tries to enter my vagina he seems to hit a barrier. And sometimes his penis moves away. I thought it may be because my vaginal canal is too small (and I'm still a virgin). Now that I think about it maybe it is a more psychological problem.

Posted by Franca on 14/08/2010 at 02:02

My virgina is too tight and i'm finding it difficult to have sex. I felt alot of pains the day i tried to make an attempt with my boyfriend. Please help me.

Posted by avin on 20/05/2010 at 09:01

have been with my boyfriend for 3 year now andd we have had sex alot of times, but my vagina keeps cloing up, and it makes me go through pain,any advice

Posted by mayur on 20/05/2010 at 12:38

how i can insert my penis in y girl friend vagina, as this is our first time ?

Posted by Mrs AA on 06/03/2010 at 05:36

Excellent article.......

Posted by natiya on 06/02/2010 at 05:26

my vagina is big i want make it small becoz when i sex with my hubby he opens to wide so pl help me

Posted by naina on 07/01/2010 at 06:37

my husband musturbates within 2 min of insertion i am non satisfied at all .pls help me

Posted by drusila on 07/01/2010 at 01:31

have been with my boyfriend for 3 year now andd we have had sex alot of times, but my vagina keeps cloing up, and it makes me go through pain, it feel like my first time, all the time. What is wrong with me? Any Advice ? x

Posted by Anonymous on 05/01/2010 at 10:30

Does your vagina get larger through your period? or does it stay the same size for the rest of you life unless you have a child, because I'm worried my vagina is too small for when I want to have sex!

Posted by candy cherries on 04/01/2010 at 06:39

just know that i am 24 years old and i have suffered with this "condition" ever since i started being sexually active at age 16. it really sucks and i really want to have sex. maybe having this condition keeps me from having a lot of one night stands or catching an std. i guess i have to look at all the positives. it prevents me from being raped or having unwanted children as well. it's not that big of a deal for me because i don't want to get married anyway.

Posted by Anonymous on 03/01/2010 at 05:01

i think i have vaginismus, but i have had sex and have had orgasims but sometimes it feels really uncomfortable! do i just need to relax??

Posted by ben cos wayne on 20/12/2009 at 04:57

use yoko yoko muscle rub on your vagina and you will boom open your hole and let the penis into you.

Posted by Anonymous on 19/11/2009 at 09:57

if you have vaginismus, check out: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/vaginismus/ I've been in this group for a long time and it has been really helpful. Many women have been cured.

Posted by Meee on 15/11/2009 at 12:18

i have been with my boyfriend for 3 year now andd we have had sex alot of times, but my vagina keeps cloing up, and it makes me go through pain, it feel like my first time, all the time. What is wrong with me? Any Advice ? x

Posted by esiri on 26/10/2009 at 12:23

hi,my own problem is quite diffrent,i married my hubby as a virgin,we didnt hav any problems with my 1st time,i didnt even bleed.however i got pregnant had my baby,but during childbirth i tore up preety bad i was stiched ,took about 3months for the stiches to heal completely as i am big on my hips and laps,however,afterwhich i didnt have sex for the next 116months,my husband and i now have tried atleast 5times in the past 2months,but it just seems impossible to penetrateme,we,v tried fopeplay and even lubricants,to no avail,it seems to me i was stiched too tight,is this possible at all.

Posted by love on 22/09/2009 at 10:18

I got married one and half yrs but we didnt have not done intercourse till date.. he looses his erection when trying to insert... Now i also dont feel like having sex. we both masturbate and satisfy.. but he is not ready to do intercourse.. please guide.. i want to hv a baby now..

Posted by faye on 19/08/2009 at 10:07

my vagina bleeds when having sex

Posted by Maria on 02/08/2009 at 01:09

My vagina is so tight and small, literally, that i feel like men compare it to a ten year old's vagina, and I would like to make it more woman-like. What can I do to stretch it out?

Posted by kate on 10/04/2009 at 12:21

My periods have stopped, i havent head one for over 3 mths, the last one was 25th January and lasted for 6 days with light spotting on the 6th day. I have Vaginisums so we dont attempt intercourse that often, i am treating my self. i am nil pills dont know what to do - My GP isnt very friendly and not easy to talk too. please advise me? thanks

Posted by Anonymous on 14/02/2009 at 06:53

My boyfriend and I are having trouble having sex... he's only been able to insert the penis once, when I was on top, and even then it was just barely. I really, really do not think that it is vaginismus. I have never had any problems with being too tense or scared or worried about sex or penetration, and I have no traumatic experiences that would lead to this, and I am always very, very comfortable with my boyfriend. We are both virgins, but have never and would never do anything that even just one of us isn't comfortable with. My only guess now is that it is a problem with my hymen, but I'm not sure and I don't know what to do.

Posted by Anonymous on 08/02/2009 at 05:52

my boyfriend and i have been dating for over a year so its been going slow in physical contact, we tried fingering and it was just too painful, i would go to the doctor but i have no insurance. what would you recommend that i do.

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